She Was Gone For Quite Some Time

she danced on fire, she wept on air, she was alive

until that day he came to violate her pride

he said, “come on baby, let’s go for a little ride”

little did she know she’d be gone for quite some time

 

now her heart pounds through her, 

scared, she stops, turns, stares, fears as eyes plunge through her

that indignant glare…fills her with cold distaste

“can you see me,” she whispers, dares

she said, “once in a lifetime, the blood comes to life, haunt, love,

flood, what have we become? wonder why I can’t say goodbye, 

you’re a child”

 

still she’d tell me how their faces would merge in the shadows of the moon

he’d say, “speak to me my love,” as leaves fell from the autumn sky

they’d lay down on the soft blanketed earth beneath them

and make wild love, as the wind blew all around them

 

the whispers surrounded her, telling her to stay stay in his bed

he pushed himself into her life, it filled her too hard too sharp

her eyes welled, lungs locked, soul cried in the darkness like a lost 

child searching for its father her spirit ran helpless and his void filled her 

 

in those days and nights of her soul there was silence

silence and the clamor of steel, steel, steel on flesh

flesh constrained, confined, designed in the silence

she’d look out at the world and through her eyes 

she’d speak to him the silence in her soul

 

and she told me that as the rainbow crosses the sun and reaches the moon

the mists will filter through the mountains in a brightly colored haze

and in that haze she could see them walking hand in hand

and in that haze she could see them walking together arm and arm

and in that haze she could see them helping each other to walk

forever in beauty

 

that day would never come, I knew, she knew it too

wall pushed against her back, she was hiding, hiding from the truth

knife held up to her throat, she was running, running to her dreams

hair pulled, pushed down on to the floor, she was fighting, she was fighting

what else did she know?

 

I watched her tears fall in hurt and motion

I felt her swirling within me, she moved me

and when she curled up in my arms, I would hold her

and when she screamed, my mouth closed over hers

 

“my Falling Star, when will you rise?” I’d say to her,

“can’t you see your beauty, can’t you see your light?

my Falling Star, shine, shine, shine…shine for me”

 

it was a cold wintry spring day that she left him

she still dances on fire, she’s still alive

sometimes she wishes she could cry

she was gone for quite some time

 

~1993